The Difference

He cried at things she didn’t expect.

Not at the obvious things — the sad films, the difficult moments, the occasions where tears were culturally called for. At those he was steady in the way she’d come to rely on. But occasionally, privately, he cried at things she would never have predicted.

She’d found out by accident the first time — a nature documentary, of all things, something about migration, and she’d looked over at him and found him very carefully not wiping his eye in a way that confirmed he absolutely was.

She’d had a choice. She’d made the right one, which was to say nothing and simply move closer on the couch and let him pretend it wasn’t happening.

Later he’d admitted it, half-amused at himself. “I know,” he’d said. “It’s embarrassing. The geese.”

“It’s not embarrassing.”

“It’s a bit embarrassing.”

“It’s one of my favorite things about you,” she’d said, and meant it.

Over the years she’d collected others: a particular kind of music. Old photographs of people in ordinary moments. Children doing something unself-consciously competent. He didn’t always name them. She watched for them anyway.

There’s a particular intimacy, she’d come to understand, in knowing the things that crack someone open quietly, the unexpected soft places they don’t always show. Not the obvious vulnerabilities but the hidden ones — the geese, the old photographs, the specific chord progression in a song from 1974.

“The documentary’s on again,” she said tonight, casually.

“I’m not watching it.”

“Okay.”

A pause. “Maybe just the beginning.”

She handed him the remote and didn’t say another word.

✦  Today’s Reflection

What are the unexpected things that move your partner — the ones they might not even admit to? And do they know you’ve noticed?


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